We have the power: The Commodore Amiga 500

One of Commodore's most successful home computers (along with the Commodore 64 Micro Computer), the Amiga 500 was a home based brother of the A2000 business computer. I got one myself  for christmas in the late 80's (roughly 1988-89), and it came bundled with the Simpsons: Bart Vs. The Space Mutants, Captain Planet & The Planeteers, Lemmings and Deluxe Paint III (the latter being used by me to draw many faces, with speech bubbles with the word 'ARSE' in them). Not a big line up of games, I grant you, but being 6/7 years old, you'd be pretty excited at the prospect of arcade-quality games in your own home (considering the Mega Drive was about 2-3 years away), and even conversions or arcade games themselves. The bundled games were a mixed bag: Lemmings was just great and frustrating, Bart Vs The Space Mutants was good and frustrating, and Captain Planet was just frustrating in its under averageness. Sure, it looked good, but it played awfully, and was the weakest of the three games.

One of the first games I'd actually bought for the machine was Treasure Island Dizzy. Now, the only experience of a Dizzy game I had was on the humble ZX Speccy, in the form of Fantasy World Dizzy, and Magicland Dizzy. The game was ok and was sodding hard to boot, with me still not knowing how to solve some of the puzzles. The other one was a game that I had originally sent through the post, and again played on the Speccy, and that was the lush graphics fest of Shadow of the Beast. It looked and sounded awesome, with an excellent opening sequence consisting of images and subtitles to tell the story. But, it was unfairly hard (which was common on those days, but this was even more so), with many paths. On the upside, at least it came with a free T-shirt (which I do in fact still have :) ). This was a taste of the things to come on this brilliant home computer. I got my hands on many more brilliant games, namely Rod-Land, Batman The Movie, Prince of Persia, Sensible Soccer, Desert Strike (ported from the Mega Drive in 1993....or was it 1992?), Apocalypse, Sensible Golf (am I the only person to love this game?) and Putty. But, one game, which would give the console shooters a run for their money, was made by Manfred Trenz, and was ported to the Spectrum, C64, Amstrad (I think :s) and later the consoles in Mega and Super flavours. That game was Turrican, and has since become somewhat of a cult classic.

Turrican showed what could be squeezed out of the 512k (1mb with the upgrade) of ram and its awesome sound chip. Playing the lead character, you run and jumped through dozens of levels, shooting a variety of aliens and end of level bosses (a giant, spiked hand, anyone?). It did show what the Amiga was truly capable of, and was an outstanding game in its own right. The mags of the time obviously thought so too, with glowing praise for it.

Yes, I do still have an Amiga 500 to this very day (admittedly, it is my fourth. The first blew up, the second one, an A600, just threw a wobbly and stopped working and the second A500 did the same and took its ball and went home), but due to space and time, I haven't the time to play it as much as I'd like. Still, there is emulation, and for that, I'm thankful, as I can now play the games I owned, own or want to own, and remember the memories the machine has given me over the past 23 years, and it's something I will pass on to my kids so they can enjoy the games I played when I was young, and let them enjoy them as much as I do.

Amiga 500: 1985 - 1996 RIP :(

Iffy Game Corner: TRON Evolution (360)

A spin off from Crap Game Corner, I take a look at some games that had some potential, but ultimately delivered groans instead of screams of joy.

TRON Evolution is a prequel to the recently released on Blu Ray TRON Legacy movie. Evolution has you, playing as the character called ANON, go around The Grid and clean up an infection by a virus program called Abraxas, and ultimately defeat him. You have a variety of moves on offer, and can run up walls, leap from wall to wall, ride light cycles, grapple to get to far ledges and control light tanks in your quest to clean up the system. The only problem is, that once you start, and get a way into the game, you'll soon get the feeling that you've seen it all before. And here is where...

Prince Of Persia. Yep, I'm afraid so. For all the running, jumping and wall-jumping you can do, it's nothing more than a re-skinned version of Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time. Yes, it looks absolutely brilliant, and sounds just as good, but the format is getting a little tired. And it's a shame really, as there is potential underneath for an excellent TRON game.

Another problem is the controls. There were sometimes when performing a wall jump (read 30 minutes worth of frustration!!!!) that you have to land the left stick in the right  place to execute it well, which is a bit troublesome as another problem is that you couldn't see the platform you were meant to jump onto, so jumps became a leap of faith because of the also dodgy camera which flails like a fish in a boat. You can move it with the right stick, but it does no good, as it still shows you nothing. I will say, though, that the levels where you ride a LightCycle and drive a LightTank are welcome breaks in the levels, and gives you something different to do when you're not scaling each and every wall.

As I said before, the graphics are outstanding, with the LightCycle trails behind your bike shining bright, and the clashes of discs when you fight an enemy. So is the music, as there are two tracks taken from the film, and original music which do the game a good service. Its just a shame it's been done as a 'been there, done that, got the t-shirt' kind of game, when it could have been so much more. And thats a kind of repeating pattern with modern released games. They all seem to copy each other, and offer no variety, and thats sad in this day an age, when no-one has the guts to do something different, and play it safe every single time.

Get your ass to Muars!! - Total Recall (Carolco - 1990)

They Stole His Mind....Now He Wants It Back!


I love a good Arnie film. Loads of slam-bang action, cool stunts and awesome one liners (who can forget the 'stick around' line in Predator after he sticks someone with a knife to a piece of wood?). So, being a die hard fan, I had to watch Total Recall when it first came on Sky back in 1991. Based on Philip K. Dick's novel 'We Can Remember It For You Wholesale', Total Recall tells the story of Doug Quaid, a lowly construction worker who is inexplicably drawn to a company called Rekall, who specialises in fake memory implants of holidays. Whilst going under for a 'trip', old suppressed memories of his old life resurface. Finding that the only way out of the whole mess, and get his life back, is to go to Mars and unravel the mystery whilst helping a bunch of freedom fighters against an evil corporation. Keeping up so far? No, me neither!

That is one big bogey. Hope he has enough tissue!

TR is one of those films that requires multiple watchings, just to get the story, as you think it's one thing, but when you watch it again, you think 'or is it this instead?' It throws so many twists that you don't know which way is up, and if the whole movie happens to him or not. Being directed by Paul Verhoeven, the dutch guy who directed Robocop, it has his trademarks: excessive violence, tongue in cheek humour and a sense that it doesn't take itself seriously (or does it??). It also looks as though there are no CGI effects in this movie at all, making it one of the last movies ever to use miniatures and models, and puppets which, in my personal opinion, makes the film look more natural and organic, and not as fake like CG.

I suppose that's one way to get 'a head!' (I'll get me coat!)

Jerry Goldsmith again comes up with a great score to accompany the action on screen, and adds some impact to the fights, especially against Richter on the lift. Sci-Fi seemed to be Goldsmith's forte, and I could quite happily listen to them all on their own. All in all, Total Recall is an enjoyable action romp with more turns than Silverstone, more mutants than Fallout 3 and a body count to rival Rambo. And it's all bloody good fun too! So, get your ass to Muars, and get ready for a surprise!

I've Got a Golden Ticket!: Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory (1971, Warner/David L. Wolper)

Roald Dahl's Charlie & The Chocolate Factory told the story of a young boy who, through his luck of finding a golden ticket, takes his grandpa Joe with him on a tour of Willy Wonka's chocolate factory, with Wonka himself being a bit on the strange side. It involved worker squirrels, Oompa Loompas, and a spoilt girl who you really want to slap hard around the moosh. It's regarded as a classic childrens book, and so David L. Wolper decided to make a musical film version of it in 1971, with the backing of the Quaker Oats Company.

This is one boat ride I wouldn't want to go on!

Starring Gene Wilder as the lovable Willy Wonka, the film has a central lesson of 'enjoy what you have, and don't ask for what you don't really want'. It had comedy, a bit of music, and Gene Wilder in one of his most memorable roles (right alongside his role in Young Frankenstein). It opened to favorable reviews, but had a lackluster box office performance, and even lead to Roald Dahl voicing his displeasure at the movie, and wouldn't even sell the rights to the follow-up book Charlie & The Great Glass Elevator. It also led to Paramount to decide against renewing it's distribution deal, and the Quaker Oats company selling it's shares of the rights to Warner. But, I believe it's Warner who have had the last laugh, as it's become a cult movie over the years due to being played on telly quite frequently (especially around Xmas time, when you've gourged yourself on chocolate, and don't want to look at another chocolate bar for about 5 minutes!!), and good VHS, and later DVD, sales.

A lovable character in a cracking film.

The film is supposedly set in the US, but was filmed entirely in Germany, and you can tell it was. The signs, the license plates, and even the street names are all in German, and not effort was made to cover this fact up. But, for that flaw, the film does redeem itself through being very enjoyable, with the other little brats getting what they deserve, and Charlie showing that a good heart always wins. The film was remade in 2006 that was ok, but the original version will always be the better one, mainly because it has warmth that the remake lacks.

The Underrated: Judge Dredd (Pathe, 1995)

In the future, there are no police, no trials, no courtrooms. Only a group of people with justice in their hands called Judges. Among them is the most famous of all, Judge Dredd (Sylvester Stallone). So, when Dredd is framed for a murder he didn't commit, it's up to him, a hacker called Fergie (Rob Schneider) and Dredd's closest friend Judge Hershey (Diane Lane), to clear his name, and bring the real murderer to justice, Dredd-style.

Being based on a British comic book, Judge Dredd is seen by some as sacrilege because he takes off his helmet which, apparently, is something he never does in the comics. Now, I've only read a couple of the comics, but that was when it was 2000AD, which also had Rogue Trooper gracing it's pages, but who cares if he never took off his helmet? Who actually gives a sodding monkeys? I don't think it's a bad film at all. Yes, some bits are disjointed, and the acting isn't up to scratch in some places, but on the whole, I think it's a fun movie. Stallone and Schneider bounce off each other brilliantly as disgraced judge and a 'nice criminal' (as he puts it), and their comic timing is great. Max Von Sydow turns in a great performance (as always) as Chief Justice Fargo and Armand Assante plays the main villain, Rico, with such evilness, you do get the sense that he'll do anything to get what he wants, no matter who gets in his way.

The storyline is based on a story arc that, I do believe, ran over three issues. And from whats on film here, I'd say it was a good story choice. There is another Dredd film in the works that is supposed to be more akin to the comics in style, but any movie adaption, be it from a book or game, is just that: An adaption. Some changes will be made to give it it's own style, and in this case, it does have style. Yes, some green screen effects look a little hokey now, but it's still an entertaining romp that does what it set out to do. And thats deliver an action film that is enjoyable.